Tips for making it clear what your boundaries are can be used to determine if a confrontation is warranted. If you have established a boundary, no matter how minute or non-existent, you are still establishing a boundary and will therefore be putting yourself at risk of losing your temper. A peaceful confrontation can only be established once you have already communicated your boundaries clearly.
There are some common sense tips for making it clear what your boundaries are that will almost certainly make a difference in whether you can avoid confrontation. The first tip is to establish your boundaries in advance and to stick to them. One of the best reasons for creating your boundaries is to avoid a confrontation. If you go out one night drinking with a friend and are rude to the person you leave but you don't stay away until they come over and apologise for their behaviour.
The second tip is that will usually make a difference is to have clear communication with your partner. Have you talked about your boundaries before you leave? When you get home do you talk about your evening or your friends? Have you discussed any boundaries?
In order to create an atmosphere where effective communication is paramount, it is a good idea to ensure that your partner knows where you stand on most issues. Using one central topic makes it easier to avoid repeating any controversial issues from the evening.
Having an initial attempt at establishing boundaries, does not mean that you cannot be flexible. If a new relationship is formed after several years together, it may take time to work out a pattern of behaviour. You will, however, be able to make it clear what your boundaries are with this basic understanding of your expectations.
The next tip is to use communication as your means of negotiating. It will be necessary to speak to your partner with some kind of clarity about what you expect to happen. If you have a problem, the appropriate method of communication will help to open up a constructive conversation.
Again, clarity is essential. If you want to be an open book, then it is likely that you will be, but if you want to be able to say no, then you need to be clear about what you expect from your partner. Only by communicating clearly about your expectations will you be able to decide what your limits are and set them at appropriate levels.
Communication is essential when you have set clear boundaries and a willingness to communicate with your partner. The third of the tips for making it clear what your boundaries are is to recognize your boundaries, and to recognize what you expect of your partner. Only when you are able to do this, will you have a clear basis on which to establish and respect your boundaries