Learning to open your heart can change your entire outlook on life. When we are hurt or feel slighted, our first reaction is to run away from the person and not look them in the eye. We turn away and cover our feelings. This is called self-protection, a defense mechanism that protects us from pain. When we want something badly, our mind conjures up all kinds of negative thoughts and emotions that lead us away from finding what we truly want.
But this does not have to be the case. Learning to open your heart can put an end to these patterns. It can free you up to be who you really are - to have all of the great relationships you've always wanted. Just because someone isn't quite "you" right now, doesn't mean they won't be in the future. You might not be able to find someone special right now, but you may be able to find them within a very short period of time.
It's important to remember, though, that learning to open your heart isn't simply pouring out your heart to someone else when the relationship has become past the dating stage. Sometimes, a person is hurt by the things that they say and the decisions they make, and then they try to distance themselves from those who they perceive are hurting them.
However, it's easy to do this when you're dealing with someone new. You don't have to be hurt by what they did; you just need to distance yourself a bit. Holding on to them so you can tell them how much you miss them and how you think they could change is unhealthy and holds no place in your relationship.
Instead, when you're learning to open your heart, you must open up to them. You cannot remain aloof and distant from the one you adore in hopes that they will leave you alone, no matter how hard you may try. If you truly desire to get your ex back, then you must be willing to be intimate with them again, whether you are seeing them through a mutual friend or through an online connection. Only then can you have a meaningful conversation about your relationship, learn how they are affected by the break up, and most importantly, begin the healing process.
The hardest thing about learning to open your heart to your ex, then, is not being able to enjoy the intimacy and friendship that come from having a relationship with them. If you truly want to learn how to win your ex back, you have to learn how to become comfortable with them again. This means that you have to learn how to interact with them as best as you can without feeling as if they are dominating every interaction you have.
If you feel as though you and your ex are inseparable, then you are free to stay that way. If you do, though, find it difficult to let go, then you should learn to open up to your ex. You will need to tell them that you think you two are meant to be, then you should take the time to listen to them and understand how they are feeling. If you are willing to open up to your ex, then the two of you are moving in a healthy direction. If you are not willing to do this, then learning to open your heart to your ex may mean that you hurt them deeply when they were hurt by you. Instead of learning how to be open to your ex, you could find yourself doing things that push your ex further away from you.
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